I like smiling, smiling is my favorite!

Hello imaginary faithful readers! I know it's been an awful long time since I have graced you with el bloggage but hey, what are ya gonna do? It's been a surreal couple of months full of some of the highest highs in my life and definitely the lowest lows. What a lovely and horrific ride it has been. Well nobody likes a Debbie Downer so I guess I should start with some good news. I am officially an auntie to the most beautiful boy! Jackson Miles, I love him so. Really, I honestly didn't know I could love something so much. I have never been one of those mushy maternal ticking time bomb kind of a woman who squeals and immediately attempts to procreate every time she sees a baby. I love babies, they're the bomb.com, i'm just not in any hurry to have a clan of my own. Being an Aunt is the PERFECT scenario. You get all the love the parents get, but none of the responsibility! I play with him two days a week while my sister works, and he's really happy and super fun, then I hand him off to her when he gets cranky. BEST JOB EVER!!!
    I'm also debating on whether I should regress and take a couple steps back in my twisted path to adulthood. I have decided to grow some cojones and jump back on the UT bandwagon so I can receive my Bachelors degree in the next millennium. I'm going back in the fall and now face a dilemma of epic proportion. My advisor feels that because of my decrepit old age for an undergrad he feels I should take on more so I can graduate before having to replace a hip or take a flying car to school.  (As you can see I have a flair for the dramatics which is why this decision is so earth shattering to me) This means I can no longer scholastically afford to work my current 40hrs/week. I obviously do not work at a hellish call center for the fun of it, I do it because it is the best paying job without a degree or without removing any clothes. Now lowering my hours per week is possible, if I want to live of ramen and easy mac again (which I have proven in the past can be done) but it looks like my current dream come true of independence will have to be put on hold so I can complete my dream of getting my degree. My only other option would be to move back into the parentals, which is something I am soooooooooooo not looking foward to. Not because my parents suck, but because Buda sucks. Not Buda itself, the location. Anyone who commutes into Austin can tell you how utterly awful and soul shattering it is. My soul is shattered enough at work without adding a hellish commute to the mix. Also, freedom and independence is EXTREMELY important to me, I loves it. I don't care what anyone says, no matter how cool or laid back your parents are, complete freedom and independence is IMPOSSIBLE when living at home. And what if the hunka burning love of my dreams FINALLY decides to show his face AFTER I move home? I'm a pretty good actress, but I don't know how long I can keep up the "these are my roomates" charade. AWKWARD! So sadly it looks like I will become "that girl." The girl who doesn't have her shit together and lives at home with her parents well into her fourties. She is STILL single, has a short Ellen-esque haircut, wears flannel,owns 50 cats, and has an expansive bed pan collection. AWESOME. :/  Stay tuned!! :)
     These past couple months have also been the hardest of my life so far. Back in December my best friend in the whole wide world received her wings and flew to Heaven. It is something I honestly never thought would happen and it ripped my heart apart. Ashley has been a friend of mine for a LONG time and we became very close after High school. She was always there for me and was the person I was most myself with. She always accepted me for who I was and loved me anyways. My friends list has definitely diminished over the years for one reason or another, but Ash was always there. I feel more alone now then ever before. It hurts so much some days it takes my breath away. That's such a dramatic thing to say but it's the truth. My heart is aching more than it ever has and I don't know how to fill the gaping hole. If this is how bad i'm hurting I can't even imagine how much her family is hurting. I am confused and angry and wish I had more faith. Faith that she is in a better place, faith that everything happens for a reason, faith that it was her time. Well, i'm selfish. Sometimes it's hard for me to think there's a better place than down here with her family and friends who love her so much. Sometimes it's hard for me to accept that the big guy had a reason to take her away so young, before she truly had a chance to live, a chance to love, a chance to star in the role she was born to play, a mom. She's the one I would normally talk to about this stuff, about everything. (Not in this super serious way, but in our typical sarcastic way, because I can never be serious about anything, and preferably in an accent) :) But she's gone, and i'm stuck in the painful silence of solitude.It's truly sad that with all the people in my life I feel I have noone to talk to. If death brings anything it brings gratitude. Gratitude for your life and everyone and everything in it. And gratitude that you were a part of their life, no matter how brief. I definitely appreciate life more and try not to let the little things get to me. I'm thankful for the life I have been given, no matter how weird it is. It also puts things in perspective. Facebook is officially the enemy again. Everything and everyone is so negative! FML (fuck my life) this and my life sucks and I hate you, blah blah blah, whine whine whine. I want to scream so loud and punch them so hard. Do they not realize how lucky they are to be breathing? Life in itself is such a precious gift and to waste it on such negativity really infuriates me. Ash never lost her smile and positive attitude, and I wish more people would follow her example. But I guess that's impossible. She was one of a kind (even though a twin to an equally awesome person) and there will never be another as awesome. I told her I loved her so many times i'm sure people thought we were lovers, but I still wish I had told her more. How much she meant to me and still means to me. How boring life is without her laugh. How much I freaking miss her. How alone I feel without her even though I know she will always be near. All in all it just plain sucks and I wish the suck fest would just pack up and leave town.
      Well to end my soap box rant....................
I was watching the Oscars tonight, feeling a tad weepy, yet still professional enough to practice my Oscar speech, a creepy little Canadian waltzed on the screen and sang a jovial little tune that makes my heart go pitter patter. It really was the perfect song at the perfect time. Honestly, smiling is the best medicine for even the deepest heartaches. Add a little Nat King Cole to the mix, and well people, that's magic. So remember, when life seems to get you down and nothing is going right, simply smile, and watch the world turn bright! :)

24 going on 12

Hello faithful, reader? Who are we kidding, Amber I should just start addressing these to you. :) It's been a long time! How's it going?

Sorry, I suck at life. I've been....so, busy? Not really, just haven't had the patience to blog in a while, BUT I'M BACK BABY! Reading my old posts made me laugh, made me cry, made me cheer, but most of all, made me cringe. I made this lovely now neglected child two years ago, two years! And I haven't posted anything in over a year. And the worst blogger of the year award goes to......

I'm sad to see not much has changed in that time, except the weight loss journey, which i'm sad to report crashed and burned along with my bmi.

I'm still in school (sigh) and should probably start telling people i'm getting my doctorate, the time it will take me to finish will be the equivalent of four doctorate degrees.The other day I was at the hospital with my favorite twins and their family, and their lovely not so little seester was chatting me up. I ever so politely asking her about her life and what her plans were for college (EEK she's almost in college, im officially old) expecting a "mollie, im only a junior! i just want to party!" Instead this little person gives a BIG answer. Listening to her map out her college life I felt an emotion I don't feel often, jealously. This giant of a girl (seriously, 17 year olds should not be taller than me)knows exactly what she's majoring in, what school she's going to, where she's going to grad school, yadda yadda yadda. When I was 17 I didn't even know what my favorite color was. NOT F'IN FAIR! How much easier starting college would have been if I actually knew what I wanted to be when I grew up (I not so secretly wanted to be, and still want to be an actress, but I don't think the world is ready for a leading lady who walks like a penguin) And to end her story she tells me, "so I probably will graduate before you." This would be funny if I didn't think it could possibly end up being true. I remove the invisible butcher knife from my heart, keep my lower lip from quivering and suck the 5 year old tears back into my eyes. Why so hung up on school, you may ask? Well, because it only comes up every time I have a conversation with someone I know, minus my twinkie bff's who know how annoying it is, because they share my passion for being a professional student. I tell people when they ask (and they do ALL THE TIME) why i'm still in school that i'm just so eager to learn! I'm such a well rounded scholar, that's why i'm still there. My new name might as well be Vaneesha Wilder. Seriously people, let auntie mollie give you some etiquette 101, if you ask someone you havent seen in a while how they're doing, and school pops ups, regardless of what you're thinking so hard in your little peanut brain (what a loser, what a dummy, why is it taking her so long, why is she still walking funny, i thought that was just a phase?) please, I beg of you, keep the damn comments and facial expressions to yourself! Yes, I realize it's strange to be in school so long. Yes, I realize that's a tad silly, but what can I say, I'm a silly girl. Why all this damn pressure? Why is my non-degree holding life so much worse than someone who finished on time? I mean....most of the people I know with bachelors degrees aren't "living the dream." Unless that dream means you work 40 hours a week, date/marry someone you're mildly interested in, live in a house you can't afford, drive a car you definitely can't afford, and make mildly interesting babies....that you sure as hell can't afford. I'm already kind of living that dream of dreams. I work 40 hours a week, ok so im not dating someone at the current time (cough, cough) but im sure I could find someone im mildly interested in, shouldnt be that hard.....right? :/ I live in an apartment I can afford (still kind of weirded out by that) my car is paid off, and i don't have any boring babies.....that i know of.... I am a proud new auntie, and i will blast you with pictures in the future, be warned! Step off people, quit hatin'! Sorry i'm not fulfilling that cookie cutter ideal of adult life thats instilled in us since we were in utero! excuse me if i tend to live life with a little pizazz! (OK, my life has no pizazz at the moment, but you never know!) Someday I will have my crap together, but thank the sweet baby Jesus that's not today! Life's so much more interesting when you're not sure what the next few years old. I'm a rebel baby, so suck it!

I might as well change the name of the blog to "soap box" or "bitching"

So here's the whole point of this ranting......

So what if i'm still in school.

So what if i'm still single.

So what if i'm not pregnant with my third child.

So what if I've got more junk in the trunk than is necessary.

So what if my life's not completely figured out.

I'm 24, not 80. I've got (hopefully) lots of living left to do.

And i'm sure (with my lovely balance) I will fall down ALOT and mess up ALOT.

But as long as I have my familia and amigos to pick me up, or fall down with me, or just point and laugh, i'll be ok.

(however, if I haven't graduated by the time my 10 year reunion pulls along, i'm moving to mexico.)

Schizo party!!

Hey Hey Hey!

So I will start off by saying that I think I might be schizo, because I keep saying hello all my readers, when in reality im pretty sure im the only one reading this. But hey, that's ok, the world is missing out!! :)

Obviously I haven't been on here in a while, and I wish I could say I have been uuber busy being miss importante and what not, but let's be real......I haven't had a job in almost a month (which will change on monday...yay!!) so I have been in super bum boredom mode. You know most people say they would rather not work and just lay around....not me. After one day of being lazy I get the itch. There is only so much cleaning, laundry, organizing, color coordinating closets one can do before she goes a little crazy! :) I even resorted to going to see a movie by my lonesome because I was so bored, I have also sat in barnes & nobles and read....all day, and now I have resorted to coming to my parents to clean and play with my mommy, which is actually very nice. I am even considering ordering my textbooks early and reading them. This is when I knew I had a problem. Im starting to feel like a major loser, again, all changes monday when i start my new job!!! Then I will be working hard for the money! so hard for it honey!! Did you just get that feeling like you wanted to have a danceplosion? I sure did! :)

Another big change in my life, I moved out of the ghetto (but refuse to change my blog name) to the westside to live with my seester and her fiance (spells trouble right there) It has been interesting, to say the least. So apparently I was brought into the apartment to be their dog sitter/maid/cook? Don't get me wrong, I am in LOVE with their dog (name's harley, he's a weimaraner & my snuggle buddy) but apparently my dog watching skills arent up to par? I dunno, so im a tad stressed with the living situation, and I dont like being stressed, not one bit!

On the positive side, the apartment is MUCH nicer than my last one, there is a ginormous balcony, my room is huge, I get my own bathroom with a HUGE shower, and there's tivo....so right there im sold. Not to mention two very nice pools (i will never use them) and a very nice big gym I frequent often (due to the boredom) I also really miss my old roomates, they were my buds and it makes me sad. :( tear....tear.....)

Im also about to embark on yet another weightloss journey. This is like the 5,000th. :) Yes, I am aware the key to losing weight is to stop eating and drinking shit and get off my lazy ass, I know there is no "holy grail" of weight loss. But I like the shit! I love my beer and cokes, popcorn @ movies, stuffed avocados from trudys, mexican martinis, chick-fila has my heart! I know it is sad to be so enamored of food, but hey, it's not like I have any other loves in my life right now outside family and friends! :) The harsh truth is I just need to lose some weight and stop eating crap and start working out, shouldnt be too hard, right? :/ So we shall see how this goes.....wish me luck! I will be smoking hot in no time in my polka dot bikini girl! Can you tell im jamming out as I write this?

Soo schleepy! Check ya later! :)

p.s. when looking for pictures, I just googled schizo, and who should pop up but jc?

Could it be fate? Stay tuned to see!

The Safety Dance

Ok, so has anyone ever heard the song "safety dance?" Well, if you haven't I feel sorry for you. It's an awesomely bad 80's dance song. I was watching TV with the good ol roomies and saw the video on VH1. Here's the link for your viewing pleasure. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HcOZ6xFxJqg

The video is a very odd medieval acid trip. It is pretty funny to say the least, my ever so rythmic roomate rafa decided he wanted to do the safety dance in our living room, and made me join him, (i know i shouldnt admit to these ever so dorky nights of safety dancing, harry potter, guitar hero, and sappy chick flicks with my MALE roomates, but they complete me.) :) So I was having fun and decided I wanted to have EVEN MORE fun. So what do I do....do I get all sexified and go dt to dance the night away, do I go to a kickass frat party and get a "roofie colada?" None of the above, because I am the coolest college kid you will ever meet, I went to go see MONTSTERS VS. ALIENS in wait for it......IMAX 3D!!!! Yeah, I know, im pretty awesome. Well.... I drag one of the two roomates (Anthony) with me, as we pull into the Bob Bullock garage I hear none other than...wait for it.....SAFETY DANCE! blaring in someones car, and who do I see bust out of that car and start dancing, but the same creeper looking people from the video! OMG you guys deja vu! So yeah, made me laugh pretty hard, and am sure is not even remotely funny or interesting to anyone else, but what are ya gonna do? :) So, a final note, everyone take a chance.....and do the safety dance!

p.s. on a funner more legit note, my seester is getting married!! The date is November 7th, I will be the maid of honor (so please help with bacelorette party ideas! :/) They are getting married at Texas Old Town (was not impressed when she told me, but I guess they have done alot to it since I have been, its beautiful! So yeah...pretty excited to have chado has a legit bro, but now the pressure will be on for me to get married (if they only knew) :) I also now have to lose lose lose some weight, because I REFUSE to be a chubs bridesmaid! :) Wish me luck!

Spring Break to-do list

So I am here, sitting in my jammies enjoying Harry Potter weekend (yes I am aware it is saturday night and I should be socializing) and couldnt be happier. Spring break is approaching and I am quite excited!! (Even though I won't be going to greece or Vegas. :( ) Being the ultimate dorkasaurus rex that I am I have developed a to-do list to keep me organized.

1) Sleep in one day! So I don't really sleep in anymore and it makes me very sad, like I have lost my childhood innocence or something, so at least ONE day oversleeping will be mine!!
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2) Catch at least one SXSW show. There are some goodies playing this year!
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3) Have a green beer!! Never had one! :( So I am going out on St. Patty's day, wearing green, and drink some green beer!

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4) Have a San-Antonio fun day! Im not a south padre kind of girl and am unfortunately too poor at the moment to take a roadtrip to Vegas, but I need to get out of Austin for at least one day, and apparently Six Flags is one of the companys that is "in trouble" of closing down. Personally I do not want to live in a world devoid of death trap good family fun! So I am going, even if it means by myself! And if im really feeling wild, I will make a stop down at the riverwalk, maybe eat at the rainforest cafe, maybe ride the river boat, catch an IMAX feature, you know...see what happens.
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5) Catch up!! So I have certain beloved friends (you know who you are) that have been avoiding me like the plague lately or vice versa, this will cease next week. I am going to play with these people I love so much and havent seen in so long.
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6) Study. (SAY WHAT!) sad I know, but my sadist professors have the week after spring break jam packed with exams, papers, quizzes, projects and whatnots. So yeah......that will blow.
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7) Go to the rodeo- I havent been in 4 years....4 YEARS!!! I live in TEXAS, home of the cowboy, this is quite sad, so I am going, only to the carnival because noone good is performing this year and the hippie inside me hates seeing those poor little calfs roped. :( POBRECITOS!!
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8) Celebrate the anniversery of my birth. GO SHORTY, ITS MY BIRTHDAY!! yeah, so not so excited about the big 23, but hey, its an excuse to celebrate so why not! Again, even if I have to celebrate by myself, I will hit up the bars and make new friends! :)
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ok so this is off-topic but whoever invented the slipper socks should be given the nobel prize. I have two pairs now and am working on my collection, and even though I am the constant butt of my roomates jokes when I wear them, this is a love that can withstand all obstacles. If you don't own a pair, you first should hit yourself for being a big dummy, and second, get your silly goose bootay in yo car, drive down to your friendly neighborhood walgreens (most open 24 hours), walmart (also open 24 hours) , or Old Navy. You're welcome in advance.
So that's all I can think of at the moment, I am welcome to suggestions of other fun shenanigans and monetary donations so that I can go to Vegas! :)

Mollieology

So I desperately need a break from studying, but the good ol' rusty brain is too fried to come up with something original, so here is a silly quiz i would normally never do.

***********TECHNOLOGY***************
How many televisions are in your house?4
what color cell phone do you have?Red
***************BIOLOGY******************
Are you right-handed or left-handed?Right
Have you ever had anything removed from your body?other than my soul...no
What is the last heavy item you lifted?alot of water, i am a muscle woman!!
Have you ever been knocked unconscious?Nope
************BULLCRAPOLOGY**************
If it were possible, would you want to know the day you were going to die?Yes, I think it would be liberating to know how much time you had left, so you could do all the things that really matter in your life and spend time with the people you love.
If you could change your name, what would you change it to?Gertrude. ;) I like my name, it's old school. Who doesnt love little richard jokes? :(
Would you drink an entire bottle of hot sauce for $1000?I would do ALOT of things for $1000 :)
************DUMBOLOGY******************
How many pairs of flip flops do you own?3, me and flipflops dont get along, they like to make me fall.
Last time you had a run-in with the cops?hmm a couple years ago when some popos thought I was a drug lord. good times.
Last person you talked to?my seester, it was not a pleasant conversation
Last person you hugged?Rafa, he's a hugger like me. :)
**************FAVORITOLOGY****************
Season?Spring, no longer summer since i go to school all four season! :(
Holiday? You can't make me choose between xmas and turkey day!
Day of the week?Saturday
Month?March. :)
***********CURRENTOLOGY*****************
Missing someone?Yes
Mood?not enjoying the massive migraine that is going strong with a vengeance & stressed about a midterm on friday.
What are you listening to?Bob Marley
Watching?duke attack my feet
Worrying about?ashley, my future living situation, my midterm. my head. ***************RANDOMOLOGY*****************
First place you went this morning?el bano
What's the last movie you saw?Slumdog millionare (when i couldnt get into watchmen, tear...tear)
Do you smile often?Oh yes, smiling's my favorite! :)
Sleeping Alone Tonight?Oh yeah, huge bed all to myself, awesome!
***************OTHER-OLOGY*****************
1)Do you always answer your phone?Nope. :)
2) Its four in the morning and you get a text message, who is it?Someone who no longer wants to be my friend. :)
3) If you could change your eye color what would it be?Im actually a fan my eyes, they're unique.
4) What flavor do you add to your drink at Sonic?cherry.
5)Do you own a digital camera?Yes, although its getting kind of old.
6)Have you ever had a pet fish?Yes, and my dog would always find a way to eat them. :( i still want a cute puffy faced goldfish for some reason.
7) Favorite Christmas song(s) All I want for Christmas is You, Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas, Grandma Got Runover by a reindeer, Little Saint Nick, Christmas baby please come home, blue christmas, the list could go on and on and on. i love it!
8) What's on your wish list for your birthday?Um lets see, Vegas, a hunkasauraus rex, $, ashley to get better so she can celebrate with me....
9) Can you do push ups?oh yeah
10) Can you do a chin up? oh yeah
11) Does the future make you more nervous or excited?umm excited?
12) Do you have any saved texts?Nope, try not to text.
13) Ever been in a car wreck?Yes, fortunately all have been fender benders. poor poor sex on wheels, you are missed. :(
14) Do you have an accent?When I feel adventurous :)
15) What is the last song to make you cry?My immortal, makes me weep everytime.
16) Plans tonight?A hot date with America, Past and Present (8th edition)
17)Have you ever felt like you hit rock bottom?Oh yeah
18) Name 3 things you bought yesterday.nothing! i was a good girl
19) Have you ever been given roses?Yes, only by the parentals though.
20) Current worry?Ashley
21) Current hate right now?When people are alone yet take up MASSIVE tables to study, frusterates me.
22) Met someone who changed your life?Yes
23) How will you bring in the New Year?probably in my usual nerdy, antisocial way, i was social this past year though and am quite proud of myself!
24) What song represents you?Bad Girl by the amazing Danity Kane. :) probably white and nerdy though. :)
25) Name three people who might complete this?nobody!
26) Would you go back in time if you were given the chance?Yes
27) Have you ever dated someone longer than a year?uhhh, next question? :)
28) Do you have any tattoos/piercings?Nada! how boring am I!?
29) Will you be in a relationship 4 months from now?Im not nostradamas
31) Would you be a pirate?Hells yeah!! oh man life would be awesome, especially if I were on Jack Sparrow and William Turners crew. oooh lala!
32)What songs do you sing in the shower?I don't discriminate, whatever shows up on the good ol' poddy!
33) Ever had someone sing to you?Oh yeah. always a blasty blast!
34) When did you last cry?hmm saturday? i had to lock it up.
36) Do you like to cuddle?Um, it is only my favorite pastime!
37)Have you held hands with anyone today?no...weird.
38) Who was the last person you took a picture of?holy moley.... new years maybe? :/
39)What kind of music did you listen to in elementary school?whatever my parents listened to. I was such a follower.
40) Do you believe in staying close with your ex?next question please. :)
41) Are most of the friends in your life new or old?Old, but I have a couple new awesome friends
42)Do you like pulpy orange juice?clumps in liquid=bad news bears
43)What is something your friends make fun of you for?being a goober, having alzheimers, my uncanny ability to not walk in a straight line and to fall/ trip on flat surfaces.
44)Do you have a crush on someone/ want to be in a relationship with someone? Yes, Robert Pattinson, if you read this, I love you and we are made for eachother, come and get me big boy! :)

Gracias!!

Ok so with everything going on lately, I have really put my life in perspective. I mean, thankfully I have always kind of had things in perspective, when you are told since you are born that you will never walk and that you will be mentally challenged your whole life, and then you do walk (like a penguin and fall down ALOT but hey its somethin) and you go to normal schools all your life and are in college (for 500 years but hey, its somethin) and yeah I may be a little goofy and blonde and dumb at times, but hey, what are ya gonna do? So honestly pity parties have never been my thing,because someone in the world will always have it worse than me, so who am I to bitch and cry because I broke a nail. But I am human and sometimes, well alot things dont go the way I hoped they would go, and it makes me a little sad. Like not doing so well on an exam, or the fact that im still in college (at least im going haters!) or realizing that I have $20 in the good ol' bank account, or not seeing some friends as much as I would like to because Im silly and am not a fan of certain people (silly i know) or just letting a certain someone walk away without telling them how I feel because I may talk big but inside im a big chicken shit scared of rejection like everyone else, or losing touch with good friends because i hate making plans, so they assume i dont like them and move on. Simply life is too short to worry about petty things or not be with the people who you love and make you happy. Why this heart to heart? Well this week I saw three people I love oh oh so much and havent seen in a long time. 1st one of my besties jill, who I havent seen since october or november, which is a long time when you live 10 minutes apart. We have so much fun together and I love her to pieces and I finally got to play with her last night and was soo happy! Then tonight I saw one of best guy friends (silly since we hardly ever talk anymore, but when we do its like we never lost touch) jonny for his bday, and made my other bestie (oh god i sound like an annoying pre-teen) amber who makes my heart go pitter patter come with me so I could see her as well. Oh yeah and last week I saw one of my other guy bff's (i really hate saying that, its like one of those dirty anatomy words to me) matt. so thats four! its a record! I have turned into quite the hermit for financial and personal reasons, so this is big for me! wow im rambling, here are all the things im thankful for (purpose of the blog)

1) being able to walk and NOT being mentally challenged. :)

2) having a job (i know i always diss it but its money and its easy and i can pretty much do whatever i want, and im good at it.)

3) my awesome family, especially the madre, i dont know what i would do without her, and my seester, even though we dont see eye to eye most of the time, i know she would do anything for me, and vice versa. shes the only seester i got man! And that I got to have courtney bless my life for 18 years.

4) my amazing friends. ashley for never being too cool for school and for being such a tough cookie, she also thinks it cool to me a grandma, as do I. :) Amber for being so much darn fun! there's never a dull moment with her. Also every time we see eachother it seems like all we do is talk talk talk, there's always so much to catch up on! Jilly for allowing me to be my dorkiest, and still be my friend. :) Clint who I opened up to quicker than anyone i've ever known, he doesnt bs me and is one of the only people i can just sit with and not have to talk. Anthony, when im around him i laugh...alot. Johnny mac for always being a sweetheart. And I can't forget matt who has taken care of me since highschool, he has always been a great friend.

So kiddies, my lesson of the day is be thankful for what and who you have in your life and try not to bitch about what you don't have. Also let these people know you love them every chance you get, because life is a short and crazy biatch and you never know where it will take you or the ones you love most. There's my sermon for the day, time to soak my dentures and watch murder she wrote, goodnight!

(who am i kidding, amber i know you're the only one who reads this, so goodnight to you my dear! )